Feeding Babies

This post is about nursing so I'm aware that there are maybe 2 people that will care to read it ever, and one of them is me. FYI.

There's one (ok a lot more than one) conversation my sister and I have a lot. It goes a little bit like this: Once you're pregnant/have kids you spend a lot of time thinking about/planning about food. When you're pregnant, if you're like us and puke the whole time, you try to think of something that actually sounds decent.

When you have kids, you try to give them everything they need. And feed them all the time. And somehow feed yourself as well. 

I still have it pretty easy, thank goodness. I have a 6 month old who basically eats one thing and fake eats other things, but isn't too awesome at the whole fruits and veggies thing yet.

I've had a great experience with breastfeeding. I didn't expect to love it or care about it as much as I do, but I secretly look forward to waking up with Milo in the night and cuddling up on the couch while he eats all groggily. I love being attached at the hip (ahem. Boob.) I love that I have what he needs. I also have built in pacifiers (you know, cause he won't take a real pacifier). It's so darn convenient sometimes!

So, at Milo's 4 month appointment, I was told I needed to start including rice cereal in his milk to help him gain weight. No problem. Pumping doesn't bother me at all. So, I pumped a couple times a day for rice bottles, and still nursed him directly a lot, and started kind of trying to get him to eat solids.

Then on Friday, at his 6 month appointment, my active, smiley, vibrant little man was classified as "failure to thrive" in the first percentile for weight. He's 25 inches (10%), 10% for head circumference, and 13 lb 14 oz, which puts him at the first percentile. Talk about mommy guilt. I promise I feed my baby as often as he tries to eat. He is usually very content and we thought he had pudged up since his last appointment. Wrong!

So the doctor said it was time to start supplementing with formula, and suggested that I do strictly formula for the next month with the option to pump and freeze my milk to keep my supply up if I wanted, and maybe still nurse once a day or so if I felt like it. We made it the recommended 6 months of strictly breast milk. I thought I was OK with letting us be done nursing (it seemed silly to pump and freeze if my milk wasn't enough). So I decided maybe it was just time to wean.

And then I cried about it the whole weekend.

And I'm talking full on basket case. Every time I saw my nursing pillow or bras or pump or child, I had another meltdown. And I talked myself in and out of weaning about 27274 times. I finally talked to my pediatrician again, and teared up within the first 2 seconds. The truth is I just am not ready to be done! And she said, no problem! Keep nursing! Just supplement! Turns out, she just didn't want me to stress about upping my supply.

Oh my heart! It is so happy and relieved! I don't mind supplementing at all if that's what Milo needs! But please oh please never let me try to wean before I'm ready again!

And so, we're still at it. I'm happy. Milo is happy. And he's getting formula as well. And that is just fine with me. I love healthy happy babies (and cuddling with them while they nurse and play with my hair! The best!).

And a big thank you to Trevor for dealing with my crazy and acting like he cares if I wean or not, and supporting me either way :) Love that man!!!