Stage Fright

Today, I had to give a presentation in class.
I don't consider myself a shy person.
I'm pretty outgoing, usually confident, and generally able to hold a conversation with just about anyone.
But I despise talking in front of crowds.
When I was little, I was terrible in piano recitals.
I always got scared and forgot my song, or made dumb mistakes.
I've never liked playing the piano for people to sing, because it's TOO MUCH PRESSURE!
I cried last time I had to speak in church.
My last words to Trevor before I begun my talk were:
"If I died right now, I wouldn't have to speak."
Seriously, who gets scared in front of church people that you know? They are the nicest ones!
Whenever I have to talk in front of the class,
my cheeks get really red
I get super hot
and sometimes my throat catches a little.
So today.
Trevor came to see me because he is the greatest husband ever.
I felt pretty good (let's be honest, the class is only like 15 people)
And I wore a shirt that pit stains wouldn't show in (TMI I know. But let's be real.)
I don't remember what I said,
but I felt pretty calm.
Trevor said I did GREAT and that it sounded AWESOME and that I didn't even sound nervous!
... except that I said "um" like a zillion times.
I had no idea.
EW!!!!
I do not want to be a nervous "you know" or "um" person!!!
New life goal:
No fidgeting.
No shaky voice.
And NO. UM'S.
And no almost crying before I have to talk in front of people.
Seriously what is the deal!!!??
... and p.s. I wrote the entire 12 page paper (single spaced?!?!?!) that went along with my presentation today. In one day.
I will sleep gooooood tonight!!